Wednesday, October 14, 2015

Elle Noel's First Trimester Survival Guide

Ahh the first trimester of pregnancy. Ain't it beautiful?! Ehhhhhh I've never been so excited to say, Bye Felecia! I felt ridiculously under prepared for how rough this time would be. Why hadn't anyone told me just how much I would hate my life? You go from the euphoria of a positive pregnancy test, or five if you're like me cause I kept taking them just for fun, to feeling like you've been run over by a sweaty smelly garbage truck and no one stops to ask if you're okay. Except for your Momma. Cause you gotta vent to somebody who really really cares about their baby. Motherhood is a life long commitment. Ask your Momma. And her Momma.

Disclaimer: I am incredibly happy, blessed, and fortunate to be pregnant. I know I will want to be pregnant again. This is the real talk version of my experience that, I cross everything I have, I will be able to repeat. So don't eat me alive for bitching.

 I guess by the time women are openly talking about their pregnancy, they've surpassed these dirty days and are onto feeling sublime. Honestly, I'm already forgetting just how awful I felt. Good thing you have this blog in which to document life! Badumcha! I'll be here all day.

So if you're still in the dark days, know that there is light at the end of the tunnel! When I first found out I was pregnant, the worst thing I dealt with, for about two weeks, was being hyper sensitive to smell, and feeling like my boobs were stabbing me from the inside. I remember thinking to myself, bah! this is a cake walk! When you start to feel overly confident the world will laugh at you. 

Then came the extreme fatigue. What do you mean I can't pump myself full of coffee, Spark!, and C4???? I was having a love affair with C4 ya'll.

Due to conflicting conclusions from numerous studies, the March of Dimes states that until more conclusive studies are done, pregnant women should limit caffeine intake to less than 200 mg per day. This is equal to about one 12 oz cup of coffee  

Read: I'm gonna die. 

I had headaches the first day I cut back to 200mg. Real talk.

But little did I know the best was yet to come. On top of feeling exhausted, the Earth being covered in #allofthesmells, I got to feel like I was going to puke

Did I mention being irrationally emotional too? I saw a squirrel family playing in my neighbor's yard and I cried. Real life.

 How will I make it through the work day? Sometimes you just gotta hide in the bathroom for a few minutes, put your head between your knees and pray. Guilty. The good news is they don't put to many bad days next to each other. I noticed a pattern : Bad day,awful day, good day, meh ok day, maybe it's over day, pregnancy- just playin gah! WORST DAY EVER, good day, etc.

This is how I survived.

1. Quease Ease -  We were besties. We went everywhere together. I will long love this sniffy pen. 

Pass a smelly man in the stair well at the gym? Not to fear, Quease Ease is here! Have a meeting and don't want to puke under the table? Pretend you are thinking really hard about ROIs and Quarterly numbers by holding this little pen under your nose! Small light taps for added pondering effect Sitting near the lavatory on an airplane, and someone just has to go number 2 on your 45 minute flight!? People are assholes. This really happened. Your bestie will be there for you.

Sometimes I felt silly huffing this pen, but NO ONE noticed. Not one single person. When I clued everyone in at work, literally everyone said to me, You felt bad? You hid it so well! Best 15 bucks I have ever spent. I'd like to thank the Academy, and Quease Ease....

2. Preggie Pops - These really helped, esp at work. Noticing a theme here? Camouflaging early pregnancy in the work place is a real challenge.  These pops really eased my nausea. To be fair, I wasn't nearly as sick as so many others. I never actually upchucked, just always felt like I was about to. I'm not sure which is worse actually. I went through two canisters of these pops. Lifesavers.

3. The Saltine Cracker - I found that if I ate a cracker or two every hour or so, it helped me not to feel as sick. Simple and basic. You can buy them at CVS on your lunch break. Or at Wal Mart if you're a planner. I had a roll in my desk, in my purse, in my car, in my bedside table. Like quease ease, we stuck together.

4. Last but certainly not least, maintaining my regular fitness routine was literally the only thing that gave me energy. The only time I still felt like ME was when I was in motion. Yes, it was difficult to stay motivated. Some days I felt the couch was screaming my name. Leigh Ann!!! Just lay down!! You deserve to put those feet up. Come to mee..... 

This Disney theme is working out nicely, huh?

However, I always had more energy to accomplish other tasks after my daily sweaty session: IE laundry doesn't stop boo. I made myself follow my routine, even on days when I would rather be in bed. Even when I was so tired I thought I couldn't make it another step. Even when my endurance dropped off and walking four flights of stairs had me huffing, I kept going. Fitness was so worth it. Don't stop! I eventually adjusted and started feeling great again. Exercise got easier. Basically everything got easier after 11 weeks. 

In hind site, the bad time passed really quickly, but when you're living it. Yikes. So much sympathy.

If all else fails, google "a really cute baby" *I did this more than once* and remember that's what you get at the end of all this. So. worth. it.

Did you have it rough your first trimester? What tricks worked for you?

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  1. My first trimester was horrible, I could barely eat at all... I dropped around 20lbs in those first 4 months. After about 15 weeks I finally felt better. The ONLY thing that made me feel even slightly better was Sonic Diet Coke... I got a Route 44 every single morning on the day to work and it made a big difference in my nausea. I had the preggie pops too, and those helped some!

  2. I love that you were real about your feelings during first trimester! I feel like people only want to share the good parts and that is why so many women are blindsided with all of these negatives! Sure you are blessed to be pregnant, but it is no cake walk and it should be talked about :)

  3. LA you are seriously cracking me up about this. I am so glad you're back!

  4. I agree 100% with all of these. For me the smell sensitivity has not stopped. Thank goodness for good smelling hand sanitizer and air freshener at work.

  5. I didn't experience nausea so much as Horrible indigestion. The Ginger People's lozenges helped a lot, also crackers. I agree that keeping my fitness routine is the only thing that kept my energy semi-normal, without it I wouldn't make it through the day... That and I found I needed exactly almost 9 hrs of sleep

  6. Why have I never heard of Quease Ease?!? Omg! I told a friend that is a few weeks behind me though so I've passed on that bit of good news!