Thursday, October 30, 2014

The Counter-grazer, she must be stopped

Counter - grazing, it's an epidemic that must be stop. Someone at my house is a daily repeat offender. Cruising along the kitchen picking what she can off innocent plates, meals mid prep in the pan, the toppings off cooling pizza belong to my Mr, no calorie shall be left uneaten.

A little pick here and a little pick there, surely it can't really be adding up. Besides, she thinks, if no one sees me eat it, it's like it didn't happen right? Right?!

Counter grazing is most intense during the evening hours. When multitasking while meal prepping. When I'm attempting to ignore how hungry I've gotten since my afternoon snack and evening work out. Dinner is on the brain, along with the laundry, always with the damn laundry.

Surely the counter grazer  will leave enough for food for meal time right? Surely she won't consume all of dinner before it actually hits the plate.

Counter grazer doesn't care. Counter grazer takes what she wants. While you're putting away laundry, she's scarfing down half of this week's ground turkey. While you're catching up on emails, she's eating half the topping off your pizza (she's really sorry about that Nick). While you're letting tomorrow's left over spaghetti sauce cool, she's licking the pan clean, right off of the stove.

She makes no apologizes. She knows you'll find something else to eat tomorrow. In fact, she's counting on it. Counter grazers constantly dream about the future, and thrive off your routine.

Nola Noel, counter- grazer, repeat offender, sometimes aided in grazing by her brother, Nacho. The ultimate accomplice. He likes pizza toppings too. Don't let that cute face fool you. She'll eat your dinner while you've left the room to hang up yesterdays slacks and not think twice about it.

Counter-grazers. They regret nothing, because your dinner is always delicious.

How do we make this stop?!

Email me

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  1. HA! I seriously thought you were referring to yourself until the very end! Sneaky sneaky!!

  2. I also thought you were talking about yourself! Our dog got so skilled at counter grazing that he got a whole muffin out of the container without knocking it off the counter. I was too impressed to be mad. We now have to leave stuff pushed way back against the wall or in the microwave. Good luck with the grazers!

  3. When you figure that out, be sure to let me know... Grady is the worst and he even eats non-food items, im SO over it!

  4. I read the whole post wondering if you were writing about Nola or yourself! Thanks for the laugh!!!